Being stuck in what feels like a dead end relationship is tough on both parties. For many women when everything else in their life is on track, marriage is the obvious next step. Unfortunately for many women, men can drag out taking the next step to the point of exhaustion. The natural reaction for many women (me included) is to push. For women who do get speedily engaged, it’s because they know how to get engaged.
I hate (really hate) to use the word ‘nag,’ but gosh darn it I am going to. What seems so obvious to you may not be as clear to your boyfriend. Is he stupid? You may be thinking. That’s not it, he’s just a man. Now that you know it, you can cope with it. You can figure out how to deal with him in a non-pushy manner and learn how to get engaged.
Let’s say you have been in a committed monogamous relationship with said man for the past two plus years, you have even moved in together. Naturally, you’re thinking about the next step. Unfortunately, he’s ignoring, side-stepping and avoiding the whole issue.
We have all either been here, or known somebody here. Women get pushy, I can sympathize here because it is so frustrating! All you want to do is take the natural next step in a relationship and in life with somebody who has already confessed his love for you and he is having none of it. What choice do you have?
As it turns out, you do have a choice. For women who do get engaged, they don’t do it by pushing. In fact, the more you push, the more you succeed only in pushing him further away. For women who know how to get engaged, and believe me they do know, whether it is conscious or not, they don’t push. Pushing does one thing, it pushes. Where you may think you are pushing your boyfriend more to the right decision, it is only affirming what is the real road block in his own mind against his ability to commit.
The added bonus of not being pushy about this subject is that while you are giving it time to cool, you and your boyfriend are getting along better! This is the first step in learning how to get engaged. It’s not manipulative, it’s not pushy, it’s just right. It may not seem like a big deal, but try it. Just try dropping the subject even for a week or two and see how much closer you two will be. The closer you two are and the less you push the subject, the closer you are to actually getting engaged, and finally getting that ring you deserve.